When My Dad's Health Declined

It was June 2000, when my Dad's health began to decline.  Although my brother lived with my parents, he was not able to detect that our Dad was having problems with his health.  It was Father's Day, June 2000, when Dad showed signs of being incontintent and it was concerning me that he was not talking much, as he normally would.

It was the following week that I made him an appt. with his doctor (Dr. Hayes), and then I took Dad to this appointment.  At this time, his blood sugar was 686 and Dr. Hayes admitted him to the Hospital.  Dad had been taking one pill a day, for his blood sugar but had run out of the med,  and was too busy farming, to get the prescription filled, is what he told the doctor.  Keep in mind, my Dad had just turned 85, on May 21, 2000.

Dad was in the Hospital for 2 weeks, and then had rehabilitation therapy, to walk and get stronger.  He was able to gain back his strength, although his ability to move about was much slower than before.  

As harvest time arrived, my brother was encouraging my Dad to run the Combine, to harvest.  I had told my brother, NOT to let Dad get on the Combine at harvest time. Dad harvested the soybeans, and my brother hauled the grain to storage bins.  It was Oct. 9th when Dad had an accident with his pickup, going off the side of the gravel road and the 'jaws of life' had to cut the cab to get Dad out.  He was a very lucky man and did not have to go to the hospital.  

Since my husband had finished harvesting early that Fall, he was able to go and run Dad's Combine, to get the corn crop out.  I was with Dad, a lot during this time, and driving him, to places, to take care of business.  I had been helping him with his book work, since he returned home from the Hospital in July.  Dad was aware that he would not be able to farm another year.  

In Dec. 2000, when we were altogether (Dad, Mother and us, 3 children), I introduced the discussion of what should be done for the next farming year.  Since my brother would not participate in this discussion, I knew that he was not ready to accept that Dad was not going to be able to farm another year.

January 2001,  Dads health continued to decline more and I knew that my brother could not leave Dad home alone, when he took our Mother to Dialysis in Shenandoah (approx. 80 miles round trip).  March 2001, is when I found a lady, who could drive Mother to her Dialysis appts. 3 times a week.

I was at my parents home,  2 or 3 times a week.  I would take food for them and I was working on getting the income tax numbers ready for the CPA,  for Dad.  I was taking their personal clothes and bedding, home with me,  to wash.  

Florence would always call and give me information, each time after driving Mother. She told me how Mother had told her, that Dad almost fell out of the wheel chair when my brother was taking him in and out of the house.  I realized that a ramp was necessary, after hearing that.  When I scheduled for someone to come and make a ramp, I called to tell my brother when they would be coming and for him to tell Mother, since she was hard of hearing and didn't like talking on the phone.  When the men arrived, my brother would not let them do the ramp. They were the same men who had replaced a big living room window for them the summer before and Mother liked these guys.

March 23, 2001, Wel-Home Health came to the house, to evaluate Dad.  When I arrived, the gals said that no one was answering the doorbell.  We, all, went in and my brother was very reluctent to having them there.  Dad needed some therapy as he was not walking well.   At the end of March,  Dad had told me that he wasn't able to think, which made me feel very badly.

Mother liked Florence, who was driving her to Dialysis,  but after about 4 weeks, my brother called Florence and told her, she wasn't needed anymore.  

The month of April became a nightmare for me.  April 4, 2001, my Dads sister, passed away.  Her health began to decline after Christmas, and I was splitting my time, going to my parents house and to the Nursing Home to see her.  I was her POA since she was never married and had no children.

My sister and I found out that our brother was taking Dad to a place in Omaha to have chelation, through the veins. Since our brother was not communicating and telling us things, we called the place to find out what time the appt. was for Dad.  My sister and I went there, so we could talk to our brother and find out what this was about.  Outside in my parents car, there was our Mother, sitting in the backseat and another lady, who I will be calling  'manipulator' , and when my sister and I stood by the car and asked this 'manipulator' to unlock the car door, she shook her head 'no'.  Our Mother was sitting, with her head down, as if she was asleep.  Mother wore hearing aids and did not hear well.

My sister and I went inside the bldg. where our Dad and brother were and Dad was hooked up to a IV for this chelation.  Our brother would not answer any of our questions.  At this point, Dad had declined so much that he was not able to carry on a conversation.  

On Easter, when we were at Dad & Mothers, I cut Dad's hair,  as he sat in the wheel- chair.  I didn't know that this would be the last haircut that I would give my Dad.  He passed away on April 27, 2001.  This was the saddest day of my life!  I had no idea of what life was going to be like,  without my Dad.  I still miss him very much!

Comments

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